"Sitting here wearing a frock, Ican't hardly afford to be judgemental about other people's life choices!I'd be happy to get to know you better - just as long as you realise thatis as far as it is going to go." OK, we have a deal," said Alec, offering his handshake to seal ourbargain.We chatted amicably for several minute and I discovered that Alec was 27;a clerk with a major firm of solicitors; and, like me enjoyed good foodand wine. "I know some fabulous little restaurants in Manchester," heenthused. "Some of them are a bit expensive so I guess that you, as astudent, won't have been able to afford to try them. I'd be delighted totake you to one some evening; my treat - but no strings attached!" hehastened to add."I'd like that," I replied, "and I'm not too proud to accept your kindoffer." It's a date then?" he responded eagerly. "How about tomorrow night?" hecontinued. "I know it's a bit sudden, but during the week I am normallytoo busy with work to go out socialising." Well you are. Woody had just come down for a break; he had been up since 7am working on some massively complex quadratic equations for math. He looked bemused.“Hi” said Mandy, carefully avoiding using his name, not sure if he was Woody or Woodrow at home “you haven’t forgotten you said you’d show me where the orchids are?”He looked confused, then daylight! Orchid – as in a name for the female genitalia – “Ah yes, I had forgotten, sorry. Give me five minutes” He dashed upstairs, scared that while he was gone, Mandy would say something that made it obvious they weren’t looking for plants. Ten minutes later he was down in jeans and lumberjack shirt, his dad looked and mouthed ‘really?’. His son was no natty dresser. Mandy and his mother were sharing beauty tips and drinking coffee. He waited patiently and finished his drink; then they left.“Tony”“Yes dear?”“Put your tongue back in. She’s your son’s girlfriend”“How? Why?”“Who knows? And I know she’s got a lovely bottom. But if you don’t stop ogling it.
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